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The Right of
Aesthetic Realism to Be Known

The May 7 class for Aesthetic Realism consultants and associates taught by Ellen Reiss was about how Aesthetic Realism sees children. We who are mothers of young children, and New York City school teachers say it is emergent that the way Aesthetic Realism understands children is needed in this country!

     The class chairman discussed a New York Times article of April 25, by Jane Brody.  The title of her article is "Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder: A Puzzling Childhood Syndrome." Ellen Reiss began the discussion by explaining that every person could give attention to things better. She was critical of the use of the word "disorder," and said, "If I asked, 'All who feel you give attention sufficiently, raise your hand'—there would be a deficit."

     The article begins by quoting from what it calls a "guide" to the subject: " 'Maybe you know my kid,' Mary Cahill Fowler writes.... 'He's the one who acts before he thinks. He's the one who says the first thing that comes to his mind....He's the kid in school with ants in his pants.'"

     The class chairman asked, "How can you like that description? A person [described that way] has to feel 'I don't like the way I'm seen!'" Those opening sentences are contemptuous: there is no trying to see the depths of a child, what a child is hoping for and may be objecting to.

     The article states that the most frequent treatment for this trouble giving attention is "daily doses of a stimulant drug, usually Ritalin...or Dexedrine." "Unfortunately," says Jane Brody, "many parents hesitate" to have their children take these drugs. She admits that "the precise cause or causes of the syndrome are not known," but writes, "The problem seems to be a neurological disorder that is often hereditary and that involves the brain mechanisms that regulate attention and impulse control."

     Ellen Reiss spoke about this unscientific writing: the vague use of the word "seems"; the acting as though the trouble of these children is understood and is "neurological," even after admitting that doctors don't know what causes it.

An Attitude to the Whole World

Ellen Reiss then read this sentence by Eli Siegel from his book Self and World which we feel represents the dignity with which Aesthetic Realism sees a person: "The large difference between Aesthetic Realism and other ways of seeing an individual is that Aesthetic Realism makes the attitude of an individual to the whole world the most critical thing in his life."

     Said the class chairman: "The question is whether this trouble of a child—trouble keeping his attention on a thing, which may be joined by a desire to race around—comes from a way of seeing the whole world. Is there a fight about the world in this child? Whether you're seventy-nine or a boy of four, you have an attitude to the whole world."

     She then explained something important about the matter of attention: "To give attention is the beginning of respect. You have to say, 'This matters and I see this as doing good for me.' Even if it's something you don't like, you're saying its meaning can do you good. For example, a scientist looking at a cancer cell doesn't like the cancer cell but thinks good can come from looking at it. To give attention is to give yourself."

     As we see our children—Michael Blaustein, age one year and three months, and Jennifer McClung, age nine months—carefully examine with wonder an ordinary object, such as a spoon, a ball, or a cup, we are moved and glad to see that this looking comes from the desire to respect the world.

     From "The Child," chapter 9 of Self and World, the class chairman read descriptions of two children whose activity worried their parents: Daniel Dorman, "an uncontrolled child in Missouri," and Luella Hargreaves, "Rampageous and Profound." She said that this chapter explains the children now being given Ritalin and Dexedrine. In it Mr. Siegel shows that children come to feel early, through what they meet, that the world is something they should guard against, be suspicious of. And so, said Ellen Reiss, a child can find it hard to give graceful attention to samples of that world. She said too that Eli Siegel's writing in this chapter is some of the greatest prose in English—for example:

Luella knows that she has a self, that this self is frantically beating at doors, fumbling with locks, restlessly trying to meet the sun; and to emerge....Well, when Luella pulls at tablecloths with company present, and wants to see candles fall, she is...saying to her parents, that the world which has been presented to her, through them, is a world she doesn't like and won't accept. She can't write letters to congressmen, nor does she know how to reach God successfully; and she can't leave home; so she yells, stamps her feet, asks strange questions, makes disconcerting statements, and annoys generally.

Said Ellen Reiss about the children written of in the Times, "There are a Self and a World in each of these children."

The Fight in Self

The Times article lists fourteen so-called symptoms of "attention deficit hyperactivity disorder," and the class chairman discussed all of them. Many are so everyday that most people would recognize them in ourselves. Ms. Reiss said: "These things are compromises in various ways [between a person's two big, opposed desires]. In each instance there is a fight: 'Should I like the world or have contempt for it?'"

     The first symptom is: "Often fidgets with hands or feet or squirms."   Asked Ms. Reiss, "Is this fidgeting or squirming a way of showing that the world doesn't suit you?" And she continued, "It also shows a desire to get into a relation you like better. Is there a simultaneous saying, 'This world doesn't fit me—but maybe it still can'?"

The Meaning of Restlessness

Symptom 2 is: "Has difficulty remaining seated when required to." Ellen Reiss explained: "Restlessness is a saying you don't like what you're in—otherwise you would stay put. [You feel] 'If I stay put, it shows the world I don't like has me in some way.' Anytime you stay put, you say 'I'm for this. I give myself to it.'" We were moved as she explained: "A frantic child is saying, 'Can't I find some relation that I like to the world?!'"

     As teachers, we have seen the pain a child feels as he or she finds it impossible to stay in his seat.  We have learned from Ellen Reiss, and from All For Education—consultants who conduct "The Aesthetic Realism Teaching Method" workshop—how to try to know a child.  We have seen firsthand the dramatic change as a child is asked questions that encourage respect for the world: that child wants to stay in his seat and learn!

     Symptom 6 is: "Has difficulty following instructions from others." Said Ms. Reiss, "You have to feel what other people are asking of you is the same as what you want for yourself if you are to like following their instructions."

     Symptom 8: "Often shifts between uncompleted activities." This, the class chairman explained, " is a kind of rhythm between not being had and giving yourself. People don't complete things—and it's because they don't feel that anything deserves them."

     Symptom 9: "Often talks excessively." "Once again," said Ms. Reiss, "we have a universal syndrome." And she explained that this talking excessively is "a desire to show yourself but not respect what you're showing yourself to. You seem to give yourself volubly, but you don't really, because you don't respect [the person you're talking to]."

     Symptom 12: "Often doesn't seem to listen to what is said." The class chairman commented, "This is so frequent. People don't listen because they feel other people don't add to them. They feel 'What goes on inside of me is superior.' "

     That describes each of us some years ago.  I, Lauren Phillips, had a very difficult time listening to a person.  I remember feeling rather clever pretending to listen and even mindlessly responding while not being engaged.  I, Barbara McClung, prided myself on my ability to appear cool and intact during a conversation, inwardly scorning the person talking, while I kept my thoughts to myself.  We're grateful to Aesthetic Realism that our contempt was criticized: we became interested in other people, and also better mothers and teachers.

     In classrooms, we have seen many children who have trouble listening. As a junior high school teacher, I, Barbara McClung, have been able to ask my students questions like this: "Do you want to hear what other people have to say—or is what you have to say the most important thing?"  As an elementary school teacher, I, Lauren Phillips, have asked young children, "Do you want the world to be inside of your mind?" and "Do you want your mind to be bigger or smaller?" Every time children hear questions like these, they show they want to be affected by the world.  They see consciously that through listening and learning they are more themselves.

Objects Represent the World

Symptom 13 is: "Often loses things." Ellen Reiss gave this explanation: "If you don't like the world you may lose things—because if an object is kept in mind, you show it means something to you. Every object you keep track of shows your love for the world. You'll lose track because you feel the world shouldn't pollute your purity. Losing objects is related to forgetting—'These things from the world will not add to me.'"

     This class was grand in its understanding of the human mind, particularly the mind of a child. We want very much for this knowledge to reach parents and teachers throughout America, so that children and all people can be seen with the respect they deserve.